Commuting

It's a little over 8am here. Yup, the morning commute. From my home to work it takes a little over 30mins. First I have to walk 250 metres to the station and "wulla" four stations later I have arrived.

I've noticed the pattern in commuting during peak and off-peak. Word of advice, don't try contemplating getting the train from Grajaú til Pinheiros, during the morning rush hour and vice-versa when finishing work.

One thing that I can say about the trains are Thank God they have aircon. Something as simple as that, you'd think it was the bare minimal to have in a tropical country.

São Paulo city has a population of well over 10 million people. So you can imagine how carriages are fully packed. In comparison to London, it's shocking. Atleast in London people have the common courtesy of waiting for the next tube if the current one is packed. Here on the otherhand, they push and shove you. Even when you can blatantly see that there is no more space inside the carriage some bozo always trys to creep in and force everyone else to become even more squished, like a tin of sardines.

When an empty train does arrive at an interconnecting station, the crowd run onto the train like a stampede of animals. At times, you can see actual smoke coming from both their ears and feet.

Commuting by bus. Atleast people form orderly queues for the bus. People here are more than happy to wait for the next empty bus in order to be guaranteed a seat. That's the surprising thing.
Bus drivers are nutsos, have you ever seen the film Speed, the one with Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock. The idea was to keep above a certain speed limit in order not to detonate a bomb. So the foot was down.
Yeah bus drivers drive like that here, utter nutters.

The metro, (as they say here) runs from 4am til midnight, Sunday to Friday and 4am til 1am on Saturdays. Sundays are pretty shitty on service as one comes every 10mins. Plus, they are always closing lines early for "maintenance" purposes. Those maintenance purposes better include fitting every carriage with aircon. Taking the metro during rush hour aint fun either. Same thing with the squishing inside carriages scenario.

Saying this and all, São Paulo is a big city with even more people residing here. So things are more expensive. Cars cost an arm, leg, eggs and sperm. It's ideal to have one, but you end up spending half of your life in traffic.

So transport in general, on the whole needs improving a lot more. It's a far cry from London. Let's hope that Brazil ups the anti and gets producing better quality modes of public transport and lower the taxes imposed on foreign cars entering this country. Otherwise I wont have anymore eggs left!

Asian gang

Since becoming acquainted with this city over a year and a half ago, I met some great people. People to whom I consider to be good friends, to whom I can trust.

It just so coincidentally happens to be that we're all Asian. One of the members is called Bruno, he's a Brazilian Japanese guy. He's just like a brother to me. I can go shopping with him, talk to him about anything and console in him in relation to oriental traditions.

The second gang member is Arvin. He's from Bangalore, India. I met him in a Couch surfing event.
Let me explain what is couch surfing. Those who want to travel & explore another country need a place to stay. Those generous members on the site, offer their couches as a good samaritan. That way you get to explore the new found area from a different perspective and maybe pick up tips a long the way. This CS meet is a regular event that occurs every Tuesday evening.

The third and fourth members are Taegyu and Sungmin. Both Korean exchange students at USP. University of São Paulo. I became acquainted with them back during the time I was living in a republica (shared house). So, we stayed used to meet up regularly for our Korean dinners, karaoke and drinkathons. Something I learnt from them was that Koreans drink beer like water.

Moving onto the fifth and sixth members. A Hong Kongese guy called Paco and a Japanese guy called Ioshi. I met both from a site called Meet up. The group was called São Paulo Happy Hour. It was a relief to have met Paco, another Cantonese speaker. I feared that once I had moved here that I would forget my Cantonese. The odd phone calls to my family only kept reminding me how much I really missed the Chinese culture and my family. So it was great to meet Paco!
Ioshi is only going to be here til June, then he'll return to Tokyo. Since leaving London, I've forgotten how Oriental English sounds. I mean, with a heavy accent! There are times when I need someone to translate what he has said in English. He reminds me of a character in the British tv programme Mind Your Language. Taro, the business man from Japan. He was always arguing with the Chinese character Soo Lin. A great tv show might I add and strongly recommend everyone watch.

Well there's the gang. In actual fact, both Koreans have returned home now that their exchange programs have ended.

So, for the moment it's just us five. At times I remember the expression "it's not about the quantity, but the quality". I see this when I look around at my circle of friends.
It's a contrast to my circle of friends back home. My best friends since secondary school and all girls. Compared to my Asian gang of men here.

The new apartment

23:53

So, over a month it's been living together with the future hubby in this apartment. Many tiresome days spent painting, moving furniture around, cleaning and buying appliances for the home. Everything is really expensive here. A bloody microwave costs over R$300!! Just under £100. Prices are rocketing and the hole in my pocket keeps getting bigger and bigger.

Hubby and Junior

            How has it been since living here though? I can't complain really. Hubby has been helpful around the home and always asks if I need help around the home. He's incharge of fixing things, IT stuff, decorating and washing the clothes. Whilst I'm incharge of cleaning the floors, maintaining the kitchen and ironing the clothes. So we each pull our own weight behind the chores. Junior is pretty cool too. He seeks refuge in his room playing computer games and creating online reviews for games that he's playing. It's amazing how science has manifestered, genetics have been passed along the bloodline. Everytime I see or hear the hubby and Junior together it makes me think ''awww how cute and adorable!!!'' It's uncanny how much they look alike too. That kid will be a genius when he goes out into the working adult world. And I always tell hubby how impressed I am by how mature and intelligent Junior is.

Ok, well moving on...
The habits that have appeared and merely popped up since living together are:

Nasal strips

• . I have problems sleeping, both normally and quietly. I have been subjected to wearing a nasal strip when I sleep, cos I make unruly, nonhuman noises. Remember when Robbie Fowler and Neymar wore them in games. (Propping up the pillows makes it worse).
• I am more prone to lower back aches than ever before. I don't know if it's because I'm having to stand up all the time on the long ass train journeys or walking around like a bent question mark, or perhaps it's because of this extremely hard mattress. Like, bloody hell!!

Hubby has been dodging the bullet by sneakily getting one of Junior's mattresses and placing it on top of his side on the bed. Talk about being on another level to me! And to add insult, I have been accused in the past of hogging the blanket when we sleep. So we now sleep with two separate blankets on our double bed. It looks weird!! Now, even my own parents share one blanket and on their bed everything matches, even though they've definitely not had any bedtime action since my younger bro. 
It's shameful!! If we ever have visitors to our home, I'm locking the door to our bedroom for the mere shame of it. 

My other flaws are also... 
I don't give enough time for hubby to correct himself when he makes a mistake in English, I take over him and when he doesn't understand what I say instead of stopping to explain more clearly, I end up repeating the word over and over again like Woody Wood Pecker.

Well hubby isn't going to be left in the lurch either...

1. He does what every bloke does and cannot help... too much shuffling and rearranging huis meat and two veg. It doesn't even stop when his family come to visit. Unbelievable, right????
2. Another thing, he burps ALOUD. I swear he never did this before. Only behind closed doors, when we're living together does he reveal his true colours and unleash the beast. The Italian burping beast. 

Favourite TV show, and only one I am willing to watch....
Panico na Band. 

A tv show that I've learned to watch. It's three hours long and consists of some crazy presenters. One is a Japanese Brazilian called Sabring Sato. Everywhere I turn she's there, advertising Japanese food, diet shakes and what not. There are also these practically naked girls wearing bikinis and dancing around showing their ample   assets. Their job merely to dance around with their tits and ass hanging out and playing games in which they get humiliated. Three hours of madness, but pretty cool. (Yes, thumbs up hubby!)

Food is the way to a man's  stomach....
Not in the case of my hubby. He eats every four hours snacking here and there. He loves cereal bars, Lipton Ice tea, toast and coffee. When we first moved in, the gas wasn't connected so we bought a George Foreman grill and ate grilled chicken and veg everyday for the first two weeks. 

Quaker Choc bars

Pilao Brazilian coffee

Toast

Hubby kept on complaining that I'd gained weight over the past few months. So I had to follow his lead and eat every four hours in order to increase my motabilism. So far, so good. I have been banned from bringing home soft drinks, as he is addicted to them. I've had to resort to drinking water and juice. I also bought fruit and veg and the hubby doesn't even eat it. He doesn't practice what he preaches, but then again saying that...''how da fuck did he manage to lose 6 kilos in 25 days?????'' 

Lipton Ice peach tea

      In reply to that, I went to the pharmacy today and weighed myself. 4 kilos lighter!! Woo hoo!! In your face!!!

Now reflections.....
Recently I had gotten back into contact with my family. My mother and sister have been talking more and I feel that the distance apart had made our relationship stronger. My family are the traditional Chinese folk. So they aren't lovey jovey, sentimental and huggable, heartfelt people. They show that they love and care through their actions more than by words, and to me that is just as great. My sister didn't tell me herself, but she went online and said that she understood and supported my decisions to move here and that means a lot to me. My sister who was always the loner always stayed in her room, away from everyone else and stayed silent. To suddenly express how proud she was of me and how much she missed me, made me feel tearful. And I welled up and had a little cry, the first since I moved here and left London. It just goes to show that those who appear on the outside with a tough exterior are just as soft inside.

Brazilian women

After having been here for two years and embraced the culture, one aspect that I've yet to embrace at all are the Brazilian women.

Now, first thing we think of when we think of Brazil as a nation is; beautiful women, great figures, tanned, plastic surgery, basically fit.
Funny how personality comes second...

I've still yet to make friends with a Brazilian woman here. I find it difficult to stand their personalities, their ego's, their mentalities, their beauty regimes, their insecurities, their nagging, their gossiping and whining. Sounds like a mother, a mother to whom I already have and am perfectly happy with.

So, I shall give you a taster as to what my perception of them are.

Image: Hair & nails- going to the salon at least once a month for their hair maintenace and the nail salon to get their nails done. Many women like to have the long, dark, well maintained flowing down the back hair. A mane of hair swishing about all the time. Women flicking it about whilst staring at themselves in the mirror or glass window of a train or bus. Each time I see this, I just give a 'tut'. Others would try to defy nature and colour their locks blonde. Yep, they'd get really bad hair jobs and look like an orange or a piece of cheese. Peroxde here is huge. And girls as young as 9 are getting their hair coloured. Unbloody believable!
Nails are a must for women of all ages. These one hour sessions could be just a manicure or both, manicure and pedicure. I tried to keep up with this trend, but gave up after the 3rd session. It's not me, and it's a waste of bloody money.

Body & body hair- women here are an assortment of shapes. Apparently the curvier you are, the more guys like this. I don't see it myself, imagine having a huge cow in your hands sitting on top of you. That woman could snap that guy's legs in the process. The ass is seen as the most attractive thing here. Well that and boobs. Cosmetic surgery is considered the most popular treatment done here and apparently it's not that expensive. I've seen enormous asses ontop of a muffin top, wobbling down the pavement and it doesn't look attractive to me. I've seen these husbands and wives, and it's like the woman just let herself go.
Ok, now this really irritates the hell out of me. Body hair! So, women here shave the underarms. BUT they don't give a fuck about the legs. I have seen some seriously hairy biker arms and legs. It's disgusting. Not even being covered up, but paraded around like it's an asset. Well fuck me! Those who have bear arms and legs try to disguise it by bleaching it. Nearly 90% of women do this in Brazil. It's disgusting I tell you! I've heard, some women shave from the knee downwards and bleach the thighs. WTF!
I tell you, if they were in the western world, they'd get a right looking at, and not in a positive way. But more as a freak of nature way. They need to gilette their arms and whole leg, from thigh to leg.

Personality: So, all women have some qualities that make us different from men. It's in our blood, we're motherly and protective in our affection. Jealousy is something that is common amongst all of us. But there are multitudes of level of jealousy. In England, I'd experienced very little of this from people around me. But in Brazil, boy is that a different story. Women here are overly jealous. Even borderline, just fucking mad and psycho! Women here give you deadly stares. When they are walking down the street with their partners they hold their hands, also gripping it. It's like fending off the opposition and saying 'back off, he's mine'. Yeah alright girl, he aint all that! If you're a bloke and you have a female colleague or plantonic female friend, you can't tell your gf you're going to meet up with them. Cos apparently in this country men and women can't be platonic friends. So the women go, ''is your friend a woman?''. Jealousy right there.

Couples in this country wear commitment rings, a solid silver band on their right hand, fore-finger. They go around strutting their stuff. Smooching around. Using metro and train stations as their hang out places. Sometimes you have to say, oh please get a bloody room!
The other week, I went to the food court and whilst sitting down to have a munch on my burger I noticed that I was surrounded by couples smooching away on the tables. I mean WTF was this! Don't you have a place to hang out of your own? Instead you have to infect the food court with your smooching.

Clothing: simple motto here: the shorter and tighter it is, the more attention you get. Now girls here adore attention. They love to parade whatever God given talents they have. Anything from tits, ass or legs. You name it. They have a type of girl here called 'piriguettes', all of the above yet they hunt for rich looking guys. I've seen dresses here that just about go under the ass. No it's not about above the knee, more like how close to the ass can we get it. Tight as well, to show you the outline of their figures. These women train at the gyms and really want to parade it. There are also those women, who don't have athletic figures and have the slight bulge or muffin top, yet that doesn't defer them from wearing something that is clearly two sizes too small for them and displaying all the puppies and tire rolls of stomach to the public.
So, here it's like saying, if you've got it flaunt it. If you haven't got it, who gives a fuck.

Now, at my law office. There are women there are really overly polished in their appearance. When I'd first started working there, women were looking at me thinking why isn't she wearing as much slap as we are? Well probably cos I don't want to look like a clown at the freak circus. Or the Joker in those Batman comics. To me, so long as you look professional and tidy that's what counts. I don't want to visit the hair salon twice a month, I don't want to take an hour at the nail salon to get my nails done 4 times a month. I don't want to wear tight fitting, and short clothing. I don't want a big ass! I'm not a Brazilian woman, so I'm not going to dress nor act like one, thank you very much!

P.S: Notice how I've not put up any images. Yeah I don't want to give anyone a hard on whilst zooming in on the images of Brazilian woman's bum, tits or silhouette of her body.

Continuing on

Law school of USP

Continuing from where I had left of...

So, as I'd mentioned in my last post. This is the university of São Paulo in Butantã. It's supposed to be one of the best public universities in Sao Paulo. Unlike other countries, public schools are supposed to be better than the private ones. But, they only allow the super rich or super intelligent to study there. I went to the campus a few times and I tell you. It's bloody huge! I went for a Thursday evening 'party', when I say party, that's what I was told. It's basically everyone just having an excuse both students and teachers to smoke weed, eat some barbecue and drink shit loads.

USP Campus

 Well saying this, I had forgotten to mention that whilst I was living in the house of fucking idiots, shortly before moving there I was experiencing stress. As I'd been moving around all the time, within a short space of time. I had become unsettled and hence my hair was falling out. I had a great big golf ball of a hole on my head. I went to the dermatologist in order to get a diagnosis. She said that I had 'alopecia areta'. Basically balding in women. She asked me whether it was hereditory, to which I answered no. Therefore she said it was down to stress.
This being said, it did take a while til I visited the dermatologist. Had to be dragged there by the fella. Let me advise you that getting any sort of medical care here is FUCKING EXPENSIVE. R$220 for a bloody consultation. This is for a so-called 1 hour consultation. We ended up waiting 30mins into our allocated time and the dermatologist only spent 10 minutes with us. She shook my hair, and it was snowing like a snow globe. Then she wrote out two prescriptions; one for the pharmacy and one for the manipulation pharmacy. At the pharmacy I had to get a drug called prednison. It's a type of anti-depressant. So it knows the nervous system. Then I had to get this solution from the farmacia do manipulacao. Manipulation as we say in English, cos the price is a rip-off! R$60 for the prednison and R$45 for the bloody solution.

Vinho quente

When my hair starting to fall out and my bald spot was showing, I went straight to the Chinese hair salon in Liberdade. I'm now known as the Chinese girl with the bald spot. Bloody hell. My centre parting of my hair, had to be changed to a side parting, to disguise the bald spot plus I had to wear headbands and hair clips to cover the spot. Well now my hair is fine, but I have sworn since that time that I shan't get stressed again.

Corinthians currency

typical caipira clothes

Moving on during June there is a holiday called 'festa junina'. It's where everyone has the excuse of wearing chequered shirts, cowboy hats, boots, carry a woven basket around and drink fruit wine known as 'vinho quente'. I celebrated last year at Parque São Jorge. Home of Corinthians leisure centre. It was pretty cool when we went. They had a few food stores; consisting of Italian food, Japanese, Brazilian BBQ and of course alcohol. The fella staying true to his roots got a lasagna. He kept boasting about how nice it was. Yadda yadda. To me it's just pasta. Just like how we orientals have noodles. Same shit, different name.

Now speaking of Corinthians. In September, they celebrated 102 years as a club. So it was down to Parque Soa Jorge for the festivities. I took a few photos of the parade and had a look around.

 They have a huge academy, with an assortment of sporting events ranging from: archery, swimming team, aquatics, martial arts, American football, cheerleading etc.
Anderson Silva the famous undefeated UFC fighter has an academy there too. He is a huge supporter of Corinthian's and when he fights always wears a Corinthian's footy shirt. This guy is everywhere, every where I go he's advertising Wizard language school. He's Casa's Bahia, a home department store. He's also advertising cars. He's basically a seen as a legend here. His alias is 'the spider', arranha.

American football team: The Steam rollers

 I had a good time at this special event marking the birthday of Corinthian's. At the same time I got to look into at first-hand what my fella does at his other 'job'.
Web radio station, Radio Coringão. He doesn't work there as a commentator, as you'd imagine. He's the tecnician guy there. Making sure that the microphone is working, the cables are correct, the quality of sound is pitch person. yadda yadda. Mind you, even though he's there on a voluntary basis, he bloody loves it. It's through this that he's been able to get free tickets to some pretty good footy games and go behind the scenes, back stage and meet a few of the players. I am bloody jealous, but he's the man with the contacts.

Taça libertadores

Maybe it's because he's part Italian. The mafia side that can get anything... for a price. Just like the prohibition during the war in the States when the mafia was running the streets.

Not being biased at all, but I've tuned in to this radio station before and it's pretty good. They have those commentators that go: ''GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL''. The one's who break the sound scale. Giving you an earache at the same time and in some cases breaking your ear drums.
But please feel free to check it out at: www.radiocoringao.com.br

No, I don't get anything for name dropping. But it's all for a good cause.
I visited the Corinthians museum and to your left you see the trophy of the Libertadores, won the league 2011-2012. Saying that I've told the fella on numergous occasions that since I became a Corintiana, Corinthians have won; the league, South American championship, world championship (in Japan) and most recently Campeão Paulista against those smelly fishes Santos FC.
Saying that I've been regularly attending Corinthians games and am now an official member. I'm a Corintiana! As you would say, so becareful cos I'm a member of the band of crazies. Ready to cause havoc, have bbq's on buses, wreck airports, drink caipirinhas on the street, make bbq's from the boot of a car. Why you may ask? Because Corinthian's is the people's club. What's more, the club was originally founded in England back in 1892 when they were simply known as The Corinthian Football club, but later they merged with Casuals Fc back in 1939 and are now formerly known as Corinthian Casual's today.
The Corinthian's team who everyone knows and ever popular is Sport Club Corinthian's Paulista (SCCP), which was founded in 1910 by 5 railworkers who loved the performance of the London based team Corinthian's Fc and decided to bring that wonderful of game called football over to here.

Almost a year hath passed...

Right, so I've just checked that my last post was back in July of last year.
A lot has happened since then, so please bear in mind that my recollection of events maybe some what scattered and hazy in some areas. So let's do it in blocks, commencing July til October.

Well, I had moved to Zona Leste a.k.a Zona Lost. When you take the metro from Down Town towards the east zone, you realise why... because it feels like bloody eternity before you arrive at any station on that line. Unbelievable! I swear I never saw ONE oriental person on the red line going towards east. I must've been the only moronic oriental. A friend of mine had offered me a place to stay for a month til I moved to another room. It's in Artur Alvim. Til this day, I still can't bloody pronounce it correct, It must be my oriental 'R's'.

Brazilian bbq

Home made cheese bread

Well I whilst crashing there, I was staying with a couple and their dog. Now, little did I know that as hosts Brazilian's are only hospitable towards for the first few days, then afterwards they go cold turkey. So I had to feel the wrath of the wife, whilst the husband was away on business. She pissed me right off! Telling me that in Brazil, when working I had to take more time over my grooming and the way I dressed. I wanted to slap her in the face with a huge fish. So I had to go all out in terms of my hair, make-up and my clothes. She even commented on my nails. Asking me questions like why don't I get a manicure. I wanted to reply 'why don't you shut up? You stupid cow!'. Shit like this to me, isn't necessary. So long as I look professional, clean-cut and do my job well. Who gives a fuck if I don't wear high heels! I don't want to hobble down the street or hold up a queue behind me when going up and down stairs, clunking away in heels.

showing off my R$30 manicure

We never argued, but I felt there was an air of hostility within the place. How she approached me to say these things annoyed me. But I thought, who gives a shit about her. She's a secretary, not the chief of being a beauty pageant. (not that i'd take beauty secrets from her anyway, the chunky monkey).

Moving on, well towards the end of the stay I managed to find a room towards the opposite direction of the metro line in Butantã.

Home of the snakes and the university of São Paulo, USP. Now upon going there, I thought to myself. Hmm this place looks cool. Peaceful, good neighbourhood, clean and a total difference to lost zone. But tons of students. I moved into a shared house. Which they call a republica. Little did I know that this place would be known as the 'house of fucking idiots'.

At the beginning it was ok. Responsible adults who predominently worked. About a 1/3 of the house were students. Everyone was Brazilian, so I was the only gringa. A couple of gringoes joined the house later, a Korean & Peruvian.
Back when I went to university, I never went to the parties or hung around the student campuses. So this was the first time I'd experienced true uni life. I tell you, everyday people were drinking cans of beers, by the shit load. Drinking it like water! Every other week there was a bbq here. Now Brazilian bbq's are much different to the western bbq's that I'm accustomed with. Here, they have chicken hearts. (which are puny), cuts of meat, garlic bread, chicken wings and linguiça (sausage). They just love bbq's here. The meat here is cut and divided into small pieces for everyone. They love sharing here.

Fastforward a couple of months, to when I was leaving. So there were Brazilian's in the republica from the north-east Pernambuco, Ceara, Bahia, Minas and one girl from outer Rio. I found after my 4 months there that Brazilian's can't be trusted. They are huge perverts. They drink too much. Spend too much time watching soap operas. Love eating rice & beans and roast meats. Adore bbq's and unreliable. ONLY according to what I experienced whilst living there. Not all are like this, but this bunch were.

Rong He massa

Whilst at that shit hole, I did manage to go escape a see a little of Down Town better. I went to Liberdade to mingle with my so-called family members. I visited the Chinese restaurants there & sampled the cuisines. There are two good Chinese restaurants there called Rong He massa. Specialising in fresh Chinese noodles made live. With the chef wearing the huge white hat and throwing the noodles around. They are the only restaurant that does 'dim sum', but it looks horrible. Like a child made it. As you can see from the photos, top left horrible siu mi, deep fried chicken, Yakisobba & Chinese greens with oyster sauce.

I went here with the fella about a month ago and waited an hour before getting a table. Fella said I ate like a horse... well not surprising after a 45min wait & back ache.

Chi Fu

 The other restaurant is next to Liberdade metro station, called Chi Fu. They have the traditional red & gold decor, staff wearing the traditional dynasty Chinese attire, circular tables AND traditional rude Chinese staff. I tell you, when they realise you're Chinese as well, you get service with a smile and they are much nicer to you. That's why each time I go there with my Asian gang, I always order the food in Chinese.

Food left-to right: Yakissoba, mussels in ginger & spring onion, greens with Chinese sausage, fried king prawns in spring onion, Cantonese roast duck and finally deep fried milk.

Yakissoba is better at Rong He, but Chi Fu have a better range of roasted meats & traditional dishes.

Ok, now that I've finished being a food critic. This chapter is finished for now... tbc

Friday 13th (dum dum dum)

Well some annoying things happened to me today. Whilst on the train, passing the smelly pine river there was a bloke who was standing next to me in the same carriage. He was grabbing the bar above his by both hands and holding on. As the train was travelling along the track, I started to feel a slight notion of some unwanted weight on the left hand side. At first, I just cast it aside as nothing, then it started to nag at me like a pain in the ass. Then as I looked to my left this bloke was bloody swaying back and forth whilst standing up and holding onto the bar. He was pissing me off and felt that it was ok for him to nod off whilst standing up right and swaying onto me. Fucker!

Then as I was making my way to meet my students down Berríni, I was busy speed walking, manouvering in and out of people like a clever dodger with nifty feet. Like Pegasus wings on my feet, if you get the drift. Then to my aghast there was a coach pulled up outside of a hotel, situated right next to the building that I have to teach. Lined up outside the coach were these bloody hotel guests who felt that in their mind it was ok to take up ALL the space and hog the whole side of the pavement. They just plopped their suitcases and what not’s onto the pavement, blocking the way for other passersby. I said spoke aloud when I said ‘’Oh for fuck sake, you’ve got to be kidding me!’’ , then a couple of the guests looked at me in dismay and then they cleared the path, like Moses clearing a path of the Red Sea. Yeah power in my hands bitches!

Then on the journey home to the republica down Butantã. I was at the Pine metro station, on the platform waiting for the train when some guy was full out in public crying.  He was rubbing his eyes, wiping his tears from his eyes, red puffy faced etc. I thought to myself ‘what a bloody attention seeker, grow some balls and man up’. Perhaps the man wanted pity or for other passersby to feel sorry for him. Well no Siree! Not this bloody girl!

So the journey finally continues, with me walking past the bakery along the main road. As I come up to the bakery I noticed a guy who looked like he was watering the bushes with a bottle of water. But as I neared, imagine to my horror when it wasn’t water he was dousing the bushes in. Yes, he brung his own hose to give the bushes a golden shower. Have these people no shame!

3 months on

 24^th May (Thursday) 2012

Well, let’s see what’s happened so far since the last blog entry, being Leap Year.

I had managed to go walk about, being a vagabond moving from town to town. I was staying in Tucuruvi for 3 months, until due to overcrowding had to move. Then went to Santo Amaro, for three weeks, and now I’m in Artur Alvim.

Now these places couldn’t be conveniently located towards the centre; instead the first was last stop going north, the second far south-east (running a long and beyond a smelly river) and now in what they call Zona Lost. I realise why now, it feels like eternity getting here.

stadium so far

Where the new stadium is being built

Map of SP metro

During all this colossal my hair started falling out. More than the usual 100 strands that women lose on a daily basis. I started getting a bald patch, so first thought was WTF am I gonna do? To which after numerous cancelled and rescheduled appointments later, the Dermatologist diagnosed me as to having ‘alopecia areata’, which basically means balding in women.

I thought that it was a result of me colouring my hair like a bitch throughout all this time, but this was not the case. This was brought on by stress. So now I have to rest as much as possible, otherwise I’m gonna end up looking like Cousin IT from the Adams family. Crikey!

Pacaembu Timao vs Palmeiras

Ok, looking to good karma things that have happened since...

I went to see a classíco game at the Pacaembu between Corinthians and Palmeiras. What a game! Never been to a game whereas the atmosphere was like that. Stadium wasn’t even full, imagine if it was. Well that was the game whereas a Palmeiras fan died and a few were put in hospital. Kids...

My team here... Corinthiana!

I decided to look at meeting new people here in this city, and hence responded to another Brit who was looking at improving her Portuguese and making friends. After a few e-mails exchanged, it was decided that we would meet down Paulista, in front of Shopping 3. Now, this girl waited 15mins then buggered off home. When I had arrived, I thought ‘where is she?’ That’s the English for ya! You would think that for someone whose in Brazil, she would get accustomed to people being late all the time. But noooooooo, she just legged it without notifying me. I tell you, it really grinded my gears! Stupid cow.

Japanese/Korean/Chinese= Lemmings

So I decided to join the Couch surfing meet-up group. They hold them every Tuesday’s down Augusta. It’s just a social group, whereas people who are in the city just meet and converse. These are people who work, study and are travelling in the city. A good way to meet new people. So last week was the first one that I attended. I thought, what have I got to lose? So I just went there and introduced myself to people, sticking out my hand and saying ‘hi, how are you my name’s Vanessa’ and so on. Everyone thought that I was Brazilian, cos I spoke in Portuguese. And each bloody one said ‘You are Japanese, right?’ or Korean. I mean, give me a break! And I swear, anyone that says ‘you are look the same, no difference to me’ is gonna get a bitch slap. No we’re not ‘all the same’, we’re not all Lemmings.

Swiftly moving on...

Work wise; I’m still teaching friends English. Not yet started working in companies, mainly because of my hair situation. No stress for the time being. Gotta get on the road to recovering. But I tell you, not working makes me feel useless. I feel like an invalid. But maybe next month, things will start having a routine and I’ll finally be able to enjoy myself.

Waiting on my working visa for my law job, so might as well teach Business assholes English in the mean whie. Then meet new people at these meet-ups and also spend more time with the few friends I have already.  

Notice how I said ‘few’ friends, there were more but I had to narrow it down a lot due to the encounters I’d had with them.

To be continued...

Leap Year...

Well an eventful month...
I'll break it down for you:

Work- managed to get more private students. But they are in lazy-mood because of carnival, so it's been a pain in the neck to get their asses back on track.
I'd managed to get an interview with a law firm here in Brazil, as they have joined part of the big law corporation that I am already working for DLA Piper. As they have two offices, one in SP and one in RJ it's protocol that I get interviewed by both branches then decide on where to stay and negotiate T&C's over contract. But that's almost certain to happen. So until my working visa comes through next month, I'll be doing the English classes til then.

Staying- am staying with a friend in Zona norte of SP. Had to move out as where I was staying previously, the guy was being a knob. He was looney!! Wanted to double the rent on an unfurnished dept. It's a nice area, apparently I'm living nearby Kaka's church. Yeah the one that he injected shit loads of dosh into. But damn, the route to here is up a steep hill. Plus the dogs are always chatting amongst themselves. Plus there's a warden who patrols the neighbourhood at night, which is why I hear whistle blowing all the time.

Places visited: well it was carnival from Fri-Tue here in SP. I didn't do anything. Just on that weekend went to a bbq. And boy do I love Brazilian bbq's! Love the meat! yum yum. Saw on tv the carnival bloco and on the last day controversy had to happen. Some idiot jumped over the barrier, nicked the results of the floats and legged it out of there. Then carnage started, with not surprising... Timão supporters causing chaos.

Caiu, (whole street of bars/clubs)

Mogi Mirim

I went to Campinas and Mogi Mirim on a whim, as a friend had invited me there for the Friday night. So I just took the bus from Tiete and went there. I noticed a lot of universities and churassco restaurants in Campinas. I'd only spent Friday evening in Caiu, in Campinas. A street full of bars and clubs etc. Then Saturday afternoon of to Mogi Mirim to meet some friends. On the way back to SP that weekend, I went pass Play Centre. Looked kinda shoddy if you asked me. 

Lapa

Anyhow tomorrow is 29th, Leap Day. It's supposed to be a lucky day apparently. Wonder what'll happen. Also am dying to go back to Rio to see my friends there, miss them. Who knows, I might just move back to RJ, nice to be near friends who you can talk to about things, who you can rely on and trust. Plus I thought that I would never say this but... I miss Lapa. Can't wait to go back and have a weekend partying and getting down in RJ.. bloody need it!

Happy Chinese New Year! (24/01/12)

Well officially yesterday the 23rd. Gotta ring my mother to wish her 'Sun neen fai lok' or 'Gong Hei Fat Choi'. It's supposed to be a lucky year round, year of the dragon.
I missed the opportunity to go to Liberdade to watch the lion dance. I guess I wasn't really in the mood to go. I really should go out more and meet new people. That means not relying so much on particular people all the time, to give me a call when they are free.

Well to summarise, been here for almost two months now. On the job side- managed to get a few private students through friends and friends of friends. I even managed to attend my first interview here in SP after donkey years. It's gonna be the same shit, teaching business English, but according to the companie's style. (Don't know if I want to do this)

Where I am living is a good place. Very central and easy to get to via bus and the metro. It's a nightmare to drive to though. I realised last month, that I live at the end of a street famous for prostitutes. I told the porters that I'm not a prossie, cos a lot of my friends have been meeting me where I live to collect me... but I'm looking to move out as soon as. I realised that I don't need a whole apartment to myself. I spend most of my time on the netbook or watching tv, so that suits me fine... and by the way, I can't be paying R$900 every month for an unfurnished apartment.

Sites and scenes. There's nothing to look forward to in SP city. The only place I want to see is Hopi-Hari and that's near Campinas. So going there by bus from the bus station, I assume that it'll take a couple of hours or so. I am planning on going back to Rio next month, for a long weekend or so. Hit the streets of Lapa and get into the 'groove'.

Encounters in RJ

So these are the people in RJ who I felt had made an impression on me. Good or bad, they all had an impact during my stay there. As I was staying in Zona Sul, I encountered a mixture of Carioca’s, Mineiros and a few gringos. It was good to explore different parts of the city and meeting new people. So all of these people I knew originally from the Internet, Couch Surfing meet-ups, meet-up group or were friends of friends.

Thank you Rio for the experience... we’ll meet again

Mr RJ- The studious and clever clogs one. Nicest person I’ve ever met in Rio. Also the longest person I’ve known. The problem towards my stay in RJ was managing to meet-up with him. But a very cool, funny and social guy.

Mr Welder- Good friend also. As he worked on a rig, he spent most of his time off-shore. Every weekend he always went to Lapa. He’s an American wannabe...

Mr London- I met this guy when I was in London. One of the people who ‘offered’ to marry me so that I could get a marriage visa. Yeah, not on your life! Marriage is for life, not just for visa. Anyway he only wants it so that he can stay in London. (Fat chance)

Mr Tarado- The health and safety inspector. His Facebook photo is of him posing next to a lifeguard stand. He thought he was David Hasselfhoff. ALWAYS a party he’s been invited to. The life and soul of a party.

Mr Captain- The good ole ‘born again Christian’.  Everyone has a friend like this. The one spreading the Good News of the Bible. He is the one always telling me to watch my mouth and stop swearing. I need a bottle of bleach to clean my mouth apparently. (lol)

Mr Apaixando- I didn’t understand about 60% of what this guy was telling me in Portuguese. He knew English, but wouldn’t speak a bloody word of it. I found him annoying, as he kept on staring at me. I was constantly thinking to myself ‘crap!’.

Mr Nerd- always one in the group! (again). Wanted to study IT, wore the stereotypical glasses, funny hair, t-shirt, jeans and trainers. Whenever he spoke English, he would sound like a ‘posh’ English person. Didn’t know if half the time he was being genuine or just taking the piss.

Ms L’oreal- a power lady, with a powerful position at a powerful company. First couple of times I met her, would speak in Portuguese. Then when I started giving her English classes, she would then speak English. She loved gringos. Always busy because of her work and hard to get hold of, but an extremely nice person.

Ms Baiana- important lady in an important company. I met her at a meet-up called ‘Aprender Ingles, learn Portuguese’. She was always in constant contact with me and checking to make sure that that I was doing ok. Pity I met her towards the end of my time in RJ, she became one of my closest friends.

Mr Braga- a friend of Ms Baiana, from Portugal. He promised to cook Portuguese food for me next time... so I’m holding him to that promise!

Mr Mineiro- the first of his kind I encountered. A bit of a chunky monkey, but he was ok. Though I did feel he was as sly as a fox. Didn’t trust the guy.

Mr Salgado- Joelho! When I was in RJ, we would meet almost every day and catch-up on events. We both worked as English teachers and were staying in Copacabana. I think it’s cos of him that my English has become infused with American English. (EW!) Every time we met, he would eat salgados. Bad influence on anyone who is on a diet- junk food addict.

Mr Marine- I know what you’re thinking. But no, he’s not gay. Very heterosexual. Nice guy who lived ‘over the bridge’ in Sao Goncalo. His English slowly improved towards the end. I gave him 3 classes and he was progressing well.

Mr Biscoito- Communicated with him for a couple of months online before we met in person. An extremely nice guy, who didn’t speak English with a Brazilian accent. We got along well as he had visited London twice and I enjoyed our talks about football.  I felt that he understood me better and knew exactly where I was coming from, as he had visited and lived in my city. It’s been difficult trying to explain my views on certain things or my behaviour, probably down to cultural difference. But he understood and I’m grateful for this.

He’s very passionate about the game and very loyal supporter of Fluminense football club. A guy you can definitely have good conversations with and a good time. He’s not just a pretty face...

Mr Forro King- Invited me to CCC Centro Cultura Carioca something something.  Was a pretty cool night, even managed to help teach my American and Aussie friend forro. 

Second week of New Year

I had made some new year rules.. well wouldn't really count them down as resolutions. But you get the drift...

As follows:

1- Stop drinking alcohol- not for health reasons (as I am blessed with wash board stomach & excellent health) but more so because from head to toe I turn bright red when under the influence of this stuff.

2. Stop hanging around with the wrong people- it's not about the quantity, more so the quality.

3. Have more clean, honest fun. So that means, attending social gatherings and going out with good, honest, reliable people who I can trust.

4. Behave myself more. I am a person of law, I must honour and protect my reputation. (hehe) After all ... I am an angel in disguise... :)

5. Spend more time with friends and family. Back home in London and over here.

6. Maybe start becoming more stable in my personal life and 'look for a boyfriend?' (In Brazil, is that possible, plus any takers?)

And on the 28th of December children...

Ok, I'm not exactly feeling inspired or motivated to do anything productive right now. I guess, I should try to summarise what 'jolly adventures' I've been on. But I dunno... maybe I need to be slapped on the face with a fish or a pair of gloves (whack whack)

On Wednesday, went tourist sight-seeing. So that meant bringing out the big ass map and circling places that Joel and I wanted to go, Journey started at 11am, as we walked to 25 de Marco. Definitely 'chingling', dirty streets full of people selling odds and sods. Then we walked up-hill to metro station Sao Bento. Down this path were a lot of fancy dress places, so if ever there is a fancy dress party coming up, then I know where to get my costume. (But most of the merchandise looked to be safadinha) tisk tisk

'genuine Cucci bags'

Ching-Ling!

Next on the list Ibirapuera Park. Though I can not for the life of me pronounce this place, I still like it! Went to Ana Rosa metro and had one long ass journey of a walk. We managed to see a place called 'Vanessa's, (it's a depilation place) Joel insisted I take a photo in front of it. I was too worried that the owner would come out of the shop and give us a bollocking over it. Anyhow, we got to the park and took a few photos, then we went to the kid's adventure playground and like ALL big kids we couldn't resist having a go on the rides. So the see-saw, the ridiculously low swing, the Flintstones car and then the climbing frame. We were WAY too big for the apparatus there and it bloody showed! 

Us showing the kids just how we do it!

Then back up the long path of hell to go back to the metro station. Yet, somehow we ended up coming out of a different exit and hence going to a different metro station further away.

Footy museum!

Pizza Rodizio with friends

Ok now, onto one of my favourite subjects... FOOTY. Onto the football museum. Now the walk going down is not a problem, (although you do have to walk by a big cemetary) but going back up... aint no way was that gonna happen. So we hailed a cab. Museum was good and informative. The shop though, load of rip-off merchants. Then after an eventful day, it was back to the Batcave for a well earned power nap. After powernap was done, it was onto a pizza rodizio in Zona Leste. Good stuff there. Mr Salgado, Joelho kept on saying yes as the various pizza's kept on flowing. Never seen a man consume so much pizza in my life (apart from those eating contests), I was worried that he would explode and I was sat right next to him!

Then by the Grace of God, we were given a ride home. That night, I couldn't sleep. Had a nightmare of a headache and I kept on tossing and turning in my sleep. I think that I managed to say 'crap' aloud. I had some markings on elbow and hand because some days ago. I was in a rush and tried to get up from an inflatable mattress. Now, those things are bloody dangerous and should come with a warning sign! I stumbled and fell, crash, boom, bang! 

29-12-11= another fell well for Joelho

So after waking up in the middle of the night several times, I managed to take a few headache tablets. It was only after taking these that I went for a nap and felt fine afterwards. So the plan was... Masp and then museum of Portuguese language. I found the Portuguese language place more interesteing. Apparently the word 'bra' came from England... I have to research into that. (Wikipedia)

There is an urban legend that the brassiere was invented by a man named Otto Titzling ("tit sling") who lost a lawsuit with Phillip de Brassiere ("fill up the brassiere"). This originated with the 1971 book Bust-Up: The Uplifting Tale of Otto Titzling and the Development of the Bra and was propagated in a comedic song from the movie Beaches.^[17] 

Yeah waste of time, didn't help. ..

Then i was back to the apartment to pack and head out to some diner for food. Prato Feito! I've become addicted to beans and rice since arriving here. Gonna have to watch my waist line.

So from there it was straight to Rodoviaria, due to the ever changing weather I had managed to acquire a cold and therefore went into a pharmacy to try and buy a medicine for this... R$25! Might as well sweat it out over the next couple of days... so I didn't get it, went home and slept... (bastards extorting money!)

Dum dum dum.... Happy Friggin' New Year!

. Well yes, I'm still in SP. I have to be careful of what I say about Paulistas/Paulistanos as you may never know... there could one day be a mysterious knocking on my door ...

Right new years eve. I was feeling kinda bored. It's not a big thing to me, new years in the Gregorian calendar. But I figured, better to spend with friends rather than couples etc. So ended up travelling to Villa Marilena or something like that to meet a friend who would collect me and we would go to Santo Andre. We had discussed specifically before meeting, that meeting point would be at the ticket counter. So when I arrived 10mins early (being the Brit that I am)  I found that they weren't there. So I stood there waiting like a lemon. Then an hour and a half had passed and I picked up the courage to ask a stranger if I could borrow her phone to send an sms to this friend. She was kind enough to let me. Then we found out that this friend not only arrived at the metro, but rather than bother to enter the actual station, he decided to wait outside in his bloody car (cos it was raining) and then bugger off. The audacity of some people! So 2 hours later we arrived in Santo Andre. A lot of people were there, and it was ok. The usual happened, I ate some stuff and drank some beers real quickly. Then was sick and then slept through new years. WAHEY! 


Then new years day. Nothing special to be honest. Ate some sausage and meat. Drank some soda. rsrs I wasn't exactly in a hungry mode. :p So that was my new years! But the company was nice, a mixed crowd of the mature, the incredibly young folk (who ask way too many nosey questions) and the young teenagers who just smoke way too much and drink too much. I mean c'mon, they idolise Bob Marley. Like how old are they! Get with the times man! :p

had it been Skol I would've been fine...

Ok moving on, on Tuesday I went to Shopping 3 to meet someone to start giving private English classes. Now why on earth Av Paulista needs shit loads of shopping centres is beyond me. PLUS they need to fix that metro map that they have been distributing. I had to go to Consolação metro station. I changed at Paulista metro and saw an exit that said 'Rua Consolação' so I followed it all the way up the never ending escalators. Then when I got out of the exit, I thought to myself.... 'hang on, this doesn't look like Av Paulista'. They don't actually tell you that you have to turn left out of the station, then turn left again and walk down. I took the other turning and walked down the street til I noticed a highway and female instinct kicked in and said 'let's turn back'. It didn't help that I was wearing my bright green 'I Love London' t-shirt and shorts. I must have looked like a right pleb! But I arrived in the end and had the lesson. 

Live music down Av Paulista

Rules for the metro... pt1.

Saw this in Liberdade

The next day I gave another lesson but this time in front of the library. Private classes for friends, is SO much more enjoyable and fun. I think I should join the trend of getting business cards printed. But I will distribute the business cards to those ONLY interested in learning English and not tarados. I've come across too many of those lately and since this is a new year, it's time to turn over a new leaf and behave like a really GOOD GIRL... so no tarados!